House-cleaning...

I'm single-handedly keeping the Kleenex company in business. Around the newsroom, it may be suggested that I do this through constant use of their fine paper products on my person. This week I am particularly in need of their tender goodness. However, my newsroom brethren would be wrong. I keep the company in business through the delicate art of toiletpaperin', where full rolls of the satiny soft substance are used to decorate homes and trees in my neighborhood.

...

I really need to stop using the prescription cough syrup before work.


File Under:

Stuff you can't afford: Your own luxury submarine!

Not quite science: G4 is reporting that wine and marijuana may help with Alzheimer's. Besides being the first time the wacky weed has been associated with helping memory, this report has an overall feeling of being less-than-official. I'm not sure what it is. Perhaps it has something to do with it being reported by the freakin' video game channel. Just a theory...

Weird inventions: This is actually useful for people in tiny apartments; an adjustable, movable desk. However, since all my readers (read: both of them) are in Tulsa, where even the studio apartments are upwards of 1200 square feet, it seems a little pointless.

Fake news: Our dearly beloved President Bush has some closing thoughts.

What recession?!: Dr. Dre has released professional-quality headphones with a pricetag of $150. However, the only people who can afford to blow that kind of money on headphones already have a pair. They got them last time they were in the studio with Dre.

Everything's better with facial hair: For the follicle-challenged, I offer you a free beard. With styles to choose from!